


He Did The Thing

by katling



Series: Chauncey The Bear [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Black Emporium, Dorks in Love, F/M, Kissing, Suggestive Themes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-09
Updated: 2015-05-09
Packaged: 2018-03-29 19:39:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3908146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katling/pseuds/katling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So… Cassandra told him not to do the thing. Cullen does the thing. Dorian is still amused. When he’s not being a four year old and sulking, that is. Josephine and Leliana are even scarier when they giggle. And The Iron Bull is bested by a small bear.</p><p>Warning: Dorks in love!</p><p>Apparently I am going to write more about this so it's a series now. You probably need to read the first one to understand what's going on in this one. Also there are spoilers for the Black Emporium.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Did The Thing

Cullen rubbed his eyes as the words on the report he was reading began to swim and bobble before his eyes. It was late and he knew he ought to at least _attempt_ to get some sleep but then, sleep had rarely been peaceful since he had stopped taking lyrium and he always found himself reluctant, preferring the gritty feeling in his eyes from sleeplessness to the heart-thumping terror of waking from his far too frequent nightmares. 

Admittedly it hadn’t been _all_ nightmares and heart-thumping terror the last few nights. Far more pleasant dreams had invaded his sleeping mind and he blushed even as he thought of them. Four days ago, he and Evelyn had kissed. And three days ago. And two. And yesterday. And today she’d slipped into his office after his morning meeting with his officers and proceeded to climb into his lap and kiss him more thoroughly than he could ever remember being kissed. Not that he’d objected to that. In fact, even the most dispassionate observer – not that there had been any dispassionate observers in the room but if there _had_ been – would have said that he was a willing and enthusiastic participant.

He groaned and tossed the report on his desk. He could feel the heat of his blushing from the memory of this morning spreading across his cheeks and ears, which was impressive because most of his blood was heading in a more southerly direction. He pinched the bridge of his nose and glanced over the papers on his desk, looking for something to distract him from his… growing problem.

The ornate script on the envelope sitting on the side of his desk caught his eye and he drew in a breath. He’d forgotten about the letter. It had arrived at the same time as Rylen and he’d set it aside, intending to come back to it later. But after Rylen had left, he been summoned to the War Room and from there he’d had to join Bull to mediate in a disagreement between a few of the Chargers and some of his men and when he’d _finally_ gotten back to his office, the letter had been all but forgotten.

He picked it up and chewed on his bottom lip for a moment before carefully breaking the seal and opening it. The missive inside was written in florid, slightly roundabout language but the message from Xenon the Antiquarian was clear enough. If the Commander was truly interested, the bear called Chauncey was for sale. For a price. 

Said price had been written in the letter and it caused Cullen to wince. It was steep but… not outside his means. He spent little of the stipend he was given and what he had saved would be enough to meet Xenon’s price.

Of course, if he did this, Cassandra was going to _kill_ him but Evelyn… well, if he was going to make a choice between which woman he was going to please, the answer was obvious. He reached for paper and ink and began to compose his reply.

*********

It was, Cullen reflected as he watched the merchants lift the small crate off their cart, a good thing that Cassandra was off somewhere in the Exalted Plains with the Inquisitor, Varric and Solas, rescuing that… _friend_ of the apostate. He would undoubtedly be getting _quite_ the lecture right now if she was here. At least he now had an opportunity to give the bear to Evelyn _before_ Cassandra realised what he’d done.

“Why is that crate _growling_?”

Cullen gave a start at the sound of Dorian’s amused voice. The mage had been sulking in the library since Evelyn had left, displeased at being left behind in favour of Solas and only emerging for their chess matches, where he’d sulked audibly at Cullen about the situation. He’d found it highly entertaining, which had only caused more sulking… this time directed at him. Dorian was a powerful mage and a good friend but sometimes he had the maturity of a four year old.

“Is it?” he said, trying to evade the question. “I… didn’t notice.”

“Have you gone deaf in last few days?” Dorian replied dryly as he walked over to peer through the slats on the end of the crate “That growling is quite…” He abruptly stopped speaking and a grin grew on his face. He looked over at Cullen and started laughing.

Cullen sighed and ran a hand down his face. He was never going to live this down.

“You bought it,” Dorian said. “You actually bought the little creature.” His face was alight with glee. “Cassandra is going to rip your head off. If you’re lucky. If you’re _un_ lucky, she’ll rip something off a bit lower.” He paused and pretended to look thoughtful. “Though Evie wouldn’t like that and they are friends so maybe she’ll just stick with your head.”

“ _Dorian_ ,” Cullen said plaintively.

Dorian walked over, still chuckling. “Luckily for you, Evie is going to float off in paroxysms of delight.” He winked roguishly. “If I were you, Commander, I’d present this particular little gift to her in private. I’m sure she’s going to want to… thank you. Enthusiastically.”

Cullen blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. “I’d…” He cleared his throat. “I’d already planned to do that.”

Dorian clapped him on the shoulder and walked off, chuckling and shaking his head. Cullen directed his soldiers to carry the crate up to his office and followed. Once he’d dismissed the soldiers, he closed the doors and gingerly opened the crate.

The small white bear came tumbling out, growling and shaking its head. It stopped and sniffed the air then wandered over to investigate Cullen’s boots. He had to admit the little creature was kind of cute. He reached down almost automatically to pat its head and scratch behind its ears and the little happy rumbling growl it made as a result left him with a smile on his face that would have embarrassed him had anyone else been there to see it. Once it had thoroughly inspected Cullen’s boots, the bear began to gambol around his office, happily bumbling into the piles of books and even the side of the desk at one point.

He was just about to go back to his reports since the bear seemed entirely happy to just wander around his office when there came a quiet knock on the door. It opened a moment later and Leliana slipped through, closing the door behind her. He didn’t even get a chance to say anything before the tiny bear bumbled over to her and began sniffing at her shoes. He had the rather… _interesting_ pleasure of seeing the Inquisition’s fearsome Spymaster break out into a broad smile and give… a tiny squeal of delight.

“Oh, he’s _adorable_ ,” Leliana cooed, scooping the little bear up into her arms.

Cullen half-rose with sudden alarm, unsure of how the bear would react to that, but the tiny creature just made a cute little barking growl and stuck its nose under Leliana’s chin, causing her to actually _giggle_. Cullen sat back down again and blinked. He’d never heard Leliana _giggle_ like that before. It was actually a bit… scary.

Before he could say or do anything, another knock came at the door and it opened immediately to reveal Josephine. The Ambassador slipped into his office with an excited look on her face and a moment later she was cooing over the tiny bear with Leliana. Cullen stared at the two women for a moment then rested his head in one hand. He’d clearly created a monster.

*******

A week later, Cullen was heartily relieved to receive news that the Inquisitor and her party would be returning that evening. He’d scarcely had a moment to get any work done with a constant parade of what felt like every man, woman and Qunari in the entirety of Skyhold trooping into his office to see the bear. Oh, they had increasingly transparent excuses about work or reports or questions needing to be answered but they were there to see the bear. Chauncey had been delighted to see them all, even Bull, with whom he’d had a completely mismatched but utterly hilarious wrestling match. Cullen was of the opinion that it would be a long time before he didn’t find funny the sight of all seven foot whatever of Iron Bull sprawled on his office floor, laughing as a small white bear stood on his chest and licked his chin, growling ferociously the whole time.

Of course, a fair number of those people who had trooped in and out of his office had taken the time to remind him – usually somewhat gleefully – that Cassandra was going to be _displeased_. However they’d also reminded him that Evelyn would be _very_ pleased and on the whole he felt that the latter outweighed the former. He _was_ just a little bit apprehensive about Cassandra’s reaction though. He was man enough to admit that.

When word came that the Inquisitor’s party had been spotted, Cullen got up and picked up the little bear. He tucked Chauncey under his arm and made his way down from his office and up to the Inquisitor’s quarters, leaving a message with Josephine. The Ambassador and Leliana had looked at the wriggling little bear and then at him and had both giggled. In unison. He’d hurriedly left at that point. Leliana and Josephine giggling together could never be a good thing.

He felt a bit uncomfortable about actually invading the Inquisitor’s rooms so he stopped on the landing between the two doors. The bear wriggled in his arms and he patted it absently as he waited nervously. Everyone had kept telling him Evelyn would be pleased but… what if she wasn’t? What if she’d changed her mind about ~~him~~ the bear? She’d been gone for nearly a month this time. That was a lot of time to change your mind.

He sighed and shifted the bear into a more comfortable position in his arms. Chauncey growled and licked his chin then settled down and finally stopped wriggling. He was being foolish. Evelyn hadn’t stopped talking about the bear since she’d first returned from the Emporium and given the… fervency of her farewell, he shouldn’t be doubting her feelings for him either. He shifted a little as the memory of that farewell rose in his mind. The way she’d kissed him and writhed against him had nearly driven him mad and after she’d left, he’d spent the rest of the day half-hard and irritable because of that.

The sound of the door opening jolted him out of his thoughts. Evelyn came bounding up the stairs with an enthusiasm he frankly envied. She was still wearing her armour and had her enormous broadsword slung on her back. Her face lit up with delight when she saw him.

“Cullen! Josie said you had somethi…”

She broke off and her eyes went wide, her mouth forming a perfect O as she saw what was in Cullen’s arms.

“ _Cullen_?” Her voice was a mix of surprise, disbelief and hope.

Cullen smiled awkwardly as he held the bear out. “Um… he’s… uh… yours.”

Evelyn closed the gap between them. She looked like she was afraid that if she blinked, he and the bear would disappear. She reached out with shaking hands and gathered the little white bear into her arms. For his part, Chauncey gave a little roaring growl and licked her chin. 

Evelyn giggled at that then looked up at Cullen with wondering eyes. “You… bought him?”

Cullen rubbed the back of his neck now that his hands were free. “Uh… yes?”

“For me?”

“…Yes.”

Evelyn patted the little bear’s head then very carefully put him down on the floor. Chauncey immediately gambolled off to investigate this new place but Evelyn wasn’t watching him. As soon as she straightened up, she _hurled_ herself at Cullen. Their respective armour clanged noisily as it met and Cullen staggered back against the wall under the force of her impact even as he brought his arms around her to bring her with him but she ignored that and instead concentrated on kissing him.

She pulled away for a moment and just looked at him. His face was flushed and his lips were wet from her sudden assault but he looked happy. Maker knows she was!

“You… you bought him for me! Cullen… you are…”

She couldn’t decide what he was and instead went back to kissing him.

Cullen was firmly of the opinion that he didn’t give a damn if Cassandra decided he needed a nice new lump on his head. Evelyn was happy. Evelyn was kissing him. He had one hand buried in her hair and the other around her back, pulling her as close as their respective armour allowed, and he was kissing her. He’d buy every damn thing in the Emporium if it meant that he had Evelyn in his arms like this.

He couldn’t have said how long they stood there kissing when Evelyn suddenly yelped into his mouth and pulled back. Her face was a picture of startled surprise and when she looked down, it changed to exasperated amusement. Cullen followed her gaze and saw that Chauncey was gnawing on the heel of her boot and growling with a sort of ferocious determination.

She swooped down and scooped the little bear up, laughing at his huffing complaints at being robbed of his enemy. “Chauncey! You’re not supposed to interrupt Mummy and Daddy when they’re busy!”

What she’d just said hit them both at more or less the same time and they both blushed and looked anywhere but at each other. It was perhaps a little early in their relationship to be making Mummy and Daddy references but it had… just slipped out.

“Cullen, I…” Evelyn began awkwardly.

Cullen didn’t give her a chance to finish whatever she’d intended to say. He slid his hand around the back of her neck and pulled her into another kiss. Evelyn made a small sound of delight and surprise and went willingly, shifting the little bear to the side so that he didn’t get squashed between them.

When the kiss ended, Evelyn leaned against him and smiled. “Cassandra’s going to kill you.”

Cullen chuckled ruefully. “I know.” He looked at her with a tenderness that made her heart stop. “It’ll be worth it.”

Evelyn smiled brightly then stepped away and held her free hand out to Cullen. “Come inside. You have to tell me how to take care of him.”

Cullen took her hand and let himself be pulled into the Inquisitor’s rooms, accompanied by the tiny bear’s growls of approval.


End file.
